My journey began a few years ago. I made the conscious choice to begin my road to self discovery. I had met many inspirational people that talked about freedom and passion once they began their journey. I wanted that, I craved that! What I learned immediately, be careful what you wish for. Little did I know, this requires an open mind and an open heart. Once you open the door to your heart, you cannot shut it. I was not prepared for this truth. But I knew with every part of my being, I was ready. During my 2 year process of self discovery I had many days and nights where my opened wounds were over flowing with mixed emotions. So naturally, as an artist, I began a series of paintings. I didn't have a pre-conceived vision, I allowed myself to have an intuitive experience. Little did I know, I was creating an amazing experience. I wasn't planning my paintings, but I was creating my setting. I was practicing self love without even realizing it! Let me explain how.
I knew that what I was doing was using my painting outlet to express my complicated feelings. I focused on creating a safe and private place for myself. I bought myself flowers, candles, snacks, and paired my feelings with music. Before I began each session, I would meditate, I would breathe, I would feel. I would allow myself to intuitively paint. My heart immediately connected to my hand, my brush was free flowing, the energy allowed me to feel and express without judgment. After each session, I felt a sense of peace. I never intended on sharing my pieces or experience. Until one day as I was instructing a paint party, it all changed.
As an art instructor I meet new people all of the time. I instruct people of different ages, genders, and backgrounds. During one of my parties I was instructing a group of women. They were in their mid 40's, coworkers, friends. I noticed that they were having a bit of trouble unwinding. A few were venting and a few were not mentally present. Intuitively, I asked the ladies to trust me and allow me to guide them through a meditation before I began. They all willfully obliged. So there I was, lighting candles and using the meditation techniques I use on myself. I was playing my music and slowly but surely gaining their trust. When I was done, almost all of them were in tears. This was not my intention. I was taken aback by their response. But I also felt extremely blessed to be able to create this experience for them. They were all very appreciative. When I went home that evening, I felt something I hadnt felt in a long time. Purpose. Passion. Direction. I knew immediately in my core, this is my gift to the world.
So there it is, this is my why. If you have yet to experience this, lets connect.